Being Trans: The Biological: Why Should I Care?

 So what does all of this mean, at the end of the day? 

All it means is that: we really don't know. We really don't know why some animals can transition between sexes and why some can't. We don't know why some people are transgender and others are not. Life is so infinitely complex that it cannot be explained by a few scientific studies. Our experiences are so complex and ever-changing that we can't reduce it down to an objective lens taken in a lab or during a study. 

Alex Stitt, the same person I quoted above, put it well in the conclusion to their article:

"Gender authenticity is not a cognition, decision, or a written script, it’s the unspoken experience of self that existed before the imposition thereof. This may sound slippery and vague, as experiences often are, until the moment they’re experienced. This is the fundamental difference between knowing and understanding. How many of us knew we were trans, yet felt stuck until we started taking steps? How many of us see the clues so clearly in retrospect? Yes, gender norms are a social construct, but you are not."

Being human is a lifelong journey of learning to listen to and trust what moves you, what makes you come alive, and what makes you feel dead inside. Maybe it's a song or a type of music: something about the sound makes you grit your teeth; something about the sound makes you want to dance. 

When that music makes you want to grit your teeth, that is called dissonance. 

When that music makes you want to dance, that is called resonance. 

What resonates with you in your life? I know for me, eating mostly vegan definitely resonates with me: I went to one extreme end of the spectrum and was 100% vegan for a year. It felt great, but I took one step back and now eat vegan 90% of the time. And that resonates for me right now: doing what I know feels good in my body while also being flexible if I'm at a restaurant or eating with a friend who loves cheese.  

What resonates for you? Maybe it's running or skiing. Maybe it's playing guitar or painting. Maybe it's cooking or reading. We all have things in our life that make our soul want to dance. The goal is to increase resonance in our life. 

The same goes for gender. Maybe it's that skirt that makes you feel pretty. The earrings that make you feel glamorous. The tank top that makes you feel strong. The haircut that makes you feel handsome. That is gender resonance. Being trans is about finding that resonance whether or not it matches up with your assigned sex. 

Being trans means that there is a lot of dissonance, too: The jacket that just doesn't feel right. The elastic that is just too tight. The shirt that is just too loose. The voice that feels alien. The curve that feels exposed. 

What can you do today to help yourself resonate with your body? Maybe it's yoga or a run. Maybe it's a nap. Maybe it's a hot shower. Either way, treat your body kindly because we only get one in this lifetime. Your body will show you what it needs to resonate with your heart and soul. Do what makes you feel good. I hope you can increase resonance in your life, whether it's a fun song or a cute shirt. I hope you do what makes you come alive.