Pictures for Our Funeral Slideshow

 Hello.

I’m not looking for a friend. 

I’m looking for a partner. 

You were there for me when I needed you the most. 

You never left my side. 

How are you? 

You don’t have to say “good.”

I want all of you. 

I want every piece of you,

The good, the bad and the ugly. 

Show me everything, put it on my altar, 

I put you on my altar. 

You are mine to behold and to worship. 

Iconoclast 

She cannot be contained 

I’m in love with them 

All of them 

Brianna is strong 

Heart 

Mind 

Body 

She masters the mountain

Conquers the kitchen 

Strums the guitar 

They are the handy queer 

She manipulates electrons

At work

And in my heart

Tall 

Fiery 

True

Fun

Nobody ever said that marriage was easy

100/100

It’s not easy. 

You were there for me when I needed you the most. 

What’s up?

You seem sad. 

You don’t want me to say “what’s wrong?”

Because there’s nothing wrong with being sad. 

We have had our ups and downs. 

Nobody ever said it would be easy. 

But we are enjoying the ride anyway. 

This ride isn’t going to stop. 

Hi. 

It’s me. 

She, he, they. 

We are both a blend of genders and identities. 

We don’t fit into your box. 

I never liked labels anyway. 

God made us this way. 

He is proud that we are made in their image. 

God doesn’t fit into a gender and neither do we. 

Nobody ever said it would be easy. 

You were there for me when I needed you the most. 

We are out here in the world. 

Some people love us,

Some people hate us. 

There is a lot of fear. 

There is a lot of scarcity. 

We turn toward love and abundance. 

She is a beauty

Inside and out

Funny and smart

Guitar 

Skiing

Climbing

Jiujitsu

I see her

Singing

Dancing 

Playing

All the days of my life. 

Nobody ever said that marriage was easy. 

Bring it on. 

Let’s grow old together. 

Collecting pictures for our funeral slideshow. 

Fire

This year, I have been using an Intuitive Writing deck that my friend, Three, gifted me. Each card has a word or shape on it, and you use that word or shape to prompt a piece of creative writing. I'm going to post a series of entries from my Intuitive Writing practice here, just for fun. 

FIRE

The fire of passion. The fire of spirit. "That girl is on fire!" We are all struggling. But when you get to witness somebody else on fire, it’s inspiring. Burning, sizzling, cracking, popping. Reds, oranges, blues. 

The fire of anger. The fire of love. Sometimes, it’s so hot it can burn you. But other times, it’s just enough to keep you alive. Other times, it’s just what you need to cook your food as fuel for the next adventure. Fire can kill, but it can also save. It can burn, but it can also cook and warm. It can consume, but it also creates light and heat. 

We don’t have all the answers. Life, writing, doing research, trying to make a mark on the world-- it's just about participating in the unfolding of the universe. It’s not always fun. It’s usually a boring, stupid game. 

But it’s your choice. You can sit there and watch. You can pout. Or, you can engage, participate, and have fun. 

Nobody will remember us after we’re gone. It’s not about being remembered.

But maybe you can infuse your fire into something that will later plant a seed and later grow a tree. It’s the butterfly effect. You don’t know how you will affect something great, far away and far after you. All you can do is keep flapping your wings. Nobody asked you to be the next winner of the most beautiful and smartest butterfly contest. They only asked you to keep flapping your wings and pollinating flowers. Not for any reason, just because the process of the ever-expanding universe is the process to find joy in, the process of creating is what is meaningful. 

The outcome doesn’t matter–people are playful and have more True Fun when they aren’t focused on the outcome or when there is no outcome, and people are more creative when there isn’t an outcome at all. Yes, there’s research on this. So just focus on the fire of spirit and passion inside of you. 

Snug Bug Poem

A snug bug is

A snug bug was

A snug bug will be

Not just for snugs. 

A snug bug is 

For distraction

From the pain of the mother fuckin world

When faced with the discomfort of boredom

It’s like an itch 

That needs to be scratched 

With a hug and a squeeze 

Even if it’s through a screen 

I haven’t been bored for a long time 

There is a void of sitting and not doing anything 

I hate it 

I want to always be doing 

Life

Fun but boring 

A breath of fresh air 

But also a waste of time 

A time to play and explore 

I don’t have it in me right now 

I can’t do anything else. 

Why did I agree to this?

Lol